RETIRED QUOTES FUNNY

“Retirement: It’s nice to get out of the rat race, but you have to learn to get along with less cheese.” – Gene Perret

“Retirement: When you quit working just to enjoy life’s moments, and then realize you forgot to take any photos.” – Unknown

“Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money.” – Jonathan Clements

“Retirement is the time when you can stop saying ‘I don’t have time for that,’ and start saying ‘I don’t have interest in that’.” – Unknown

“Retirement is wonderful. It’s doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it.” – Gene Perret

“Retirement is the phase of life where happy hour is any hour.” – Unknown

“Retirement: The only real battle is between you and the mosquitoes.” – Unknown

“Retirement: The time to spoil your grandchildren and annoy their parents.” – Unknown

“You know you’re retired when your weekends become longer than your workdays.” – Unknown

“Retirement: The art of never getting up early in the morning again.” – Unknown

“I’m not retiring, I’m just entering the ‘I’ll do it when I feel like it’ phase of my life.” – Unknown

“Retirement is the time when you can finally hit the snooze button without feeling guilty.” – Unknown

“Retirement is like a long vacation, except you never leave home and you’re not earning any money.” – Unknown

“Retirement: The time when you stop making a living and start making a life.” – Unknown

“Retirement: That wonderful time in life when you can do whatever you want, as long as you can remember what it was.” – Unknown

“Retirement is when you become your own boss and answer to your inner couch potato.” – Unknown

“Retirement is the golden age when ‘early to bed, early to rise’ makes no sense at all.” – Unknown

“Retirement is like a never-ending weekend, except you spend more time resting and less time partying.” – Unknown

“Retirement: The moment when you realize that now you have time to do all the things you didn’t want to do when you were working.” – Unknown

“Retirement is the time when you can finally stop counting the days until Friday.” – Unknown

“Retirement is like a long honeymoon, except you don’t have to tolerate someone else’s snoring.” – Unknown

“Retirement is the stage of life where every day is Saturday, except Sunday because that’s reserved for naps.” – Unknown

“Retirement is the time when you can finally put your feet up and watch the grass grow, without mowing it yourself.” – Unknown

“Retirement is when you can finally delegate all your worries to the younger generation.” – Unknown

“Retirement: The time when you can wear your pajamas all day and no one judges you.” – Unknown

“Retirement is like winning a lifetime supply of Saturdays.” – Unknown

“Retirement is when you can finally focus on the important things in life, like catching up on all the shows you missed.” – Unknown

“Retirement is the period of life when you can finally appreciate the little things, like not setting an alarm clock.” – Unknown

“Retirement is when you stop living at work and start working at living.” – Unknown

“Retirement is like reaching the finish line of a marathon, only to realize there’s no medal, just a cozy armchair.” – Unknown