“I have mixed drinks about feelings, but I prefer beer.” – Unknown

“Beer: because no good story started with someone eating a salad.” – Unknown

“Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.” – Benjamin Franklin

“Beer is like a hug in a mug.” – Unknown

“Beer is the answer. I don’t remember the question.” – Unknown

“In dog beers, I’ve only had one.” – Unknown

“I decided to become a beer drinker because I’m a poet, and I appreciate metaphorical transparency.” – Jarod Kintz

“Why buy beer when you can create it yourself? I’m a born brewer with a twist!” – Unknown

“Beer: It’s not just for breakfast anymore.” – Unknown

“I’m on a seafood diet. I see beer, and I drink it.” – Unknown

“Oh, beer! The cause and solution to all of life’s problems.” – Homer Simpson

“Warning: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary…like your face.” – Unknown

“Beer is a constant reminder that there are better things to worry about than worrying itself.” – Unknown

“Beer: Because adulting is hard.” – Unknown

“When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.” – Henny Youngman

“Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer.” – Henry Lawson

“Beer: Helping people lower their standards for centuries.” – Unknown

“I’m not an alcoholic, I’m a beer enthusiast.” – Unknown

“I exercise strong self-control; I never drink anything stronger than beer before breakfast.” – W.C. Fields

“Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since 3000 B.C.” – Unknown

“Save water, drink beer!” – Unknown

“Beer: The best beer you ever tasted is the next one.” – Unknown

“Beer is proof that God loves us and wants to see us happy – even on Mondays.” – Unknown

“I work until beer o’clock.” – Unknown

“I’m not an alcoholic, I’m a barley appreciative person.” – Unknown

“Beer: The cause of and solution to all of life’s problems.” – Homer Simpson

“Life is too short to drink bad beer.” – Unknown

“Don’t worry, beer happy!” – Unknown

“The only thing better than a cold beer is another beer.” – Unknown

“Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.” – Kinky Friedman